Broccoli Cheddar Soup-Panera Style

• I've been asked a few times in recent weeks for a recipe for my Broccoli Cheddar Soup and well folks, I'm finally getting around to sharing it! Now I have to admit I almost never measure out anything unless I'm baking so uh, proceed with caution! ;) I also don't have any hip pictures of this dish except for this one picture from my lousy camera phone, sorry, but I promise...it's delish!

This recipe served 6 people with a enough for a few seconds so alter as needed.

INGREDIENTS: 

• 2 medium bunches of fresh broccoli
• 4 cups chicken broth (I used bouillon cubes and water since that's what I had on hand) 
• 1 large onion-chopped
• 1 - 1 1/2 cups shredded carrots
• 1 cup shredded cheddar cheese
• 1 tsp (2 cloves) minced garlic (maybe a a little more-we love our garlic over here)
• 16 oz (1 carton or 2 cups) half and half
• 4-5 tbsp flour (add a little more or less to your likening of the thickness of the soup)
• 4-6 tbsp butter
• 1-2 bay leaves for some extra flavor (optional)
• 
  
• SPICES: These are probably pretty good estimates but don't forget to taste as you go!
• 
  
• ¼ allspice
• ¼ ground nutmeg (optional)
• ¼dried basil
• ¼ cayenne pepper (I honestly know it was more than this but my Husby likes things SPICY so yeah..)
• ¼ salt
• a few dashes of ground black pepper
• 
  
• 1. Chop, shred and dice those veggies! Leave a few bigger chunks of the broccoli to add in for some yummy, chunkier bites.

2. Warm your chicken broth in a pot on med heat and slowly add in your carrots, onion, garlic and bay leaves (the leaves you'll remove later). Simmer for about 15 minutes or until the onion is almost clear and the veggies are cooked through.

3. On the side in a larger pot melt  your butter and whisk. Continue to whisk as you add in your flour.

4. Once your flour is all mixed in add your veggie/chicken broth mixture.

5. Stir in your half in half. I did about a cup at a time and let simmer on low heat.

6. Stir in the spices and this is where I removed the bay leaves. It was a task trying to find them though!

7. I put the soup into sourdough bread bowls and we used the tops to dip in the soup or add a little butter to to eat that way. 

8. I topped it off with the cheddar cheese and dug on in!


Ps, I can't take ALL the credit for this yummy-ness I searched Pinterest high and low for some ideas and put the best  of what I saw into one great recipe!

The final countdown

I know it's April 1st which means April Fools Day. I wish I had something really clever to tell you that I pulled on my hubby this morning but alas, I do not. Maybe next year. (I say that every year). But maybe since I haven't pulled a trick on him in two years now he just won't be expecting it and I can have something amazing up my sleeve! We'll see. If you have any ideas please share them with me!


The main reason for this post is we have FINALLY made it to April! Graduation is just around the corner and I'm getting very impatient. It's like waiting for the last trimester of pregnancy to just hurry it's little tooshy up so I can see the new babes! (No no, not an announcement, just an example of how impatient I am.)

All morning I have had this song in my head and the fact that it's Spongebob only makes it that much better.

This month I have SO much to do and I don't even know where to begin or when to start. Just so much to do.

Where are we going? I DON'T KNOW!
How will we get there? I DON'T KNOW!
When are we leaving? I DON'T KNOW!

Do you see a pattern here?

I'm just going to try not to worry and take things as they come. Haaaaa! Hardy har har. Now THAT'S a good Aprils Fools joke! I'm really stressin', guys.

24 DAYS!

Goals for the Spring & Summer

It's Spring. Finally, right? I can't even begin to tell you how badly I have yearned for the sunshine on my face again. Just two days ago we had a whopping high of 70 degrees! I even got a SUNBURN! Pretty sure that's the first time I've ever been happy about that. This truly magical weather was followed by a day of overcast skies, sporadic rain and a freak hail storm. Welcome to Utah, my friends!

Since the change in seasons I figured it was time to write out some goals for the upcoming months. Which by the way, these next few months are going to be a heck of a ride for this family. We have lots, and I mean lots, of new adventures on the rise. I'll share one with you:

GRADUATION DAY!!

And basically all that comes with that. Job hunting, moving etc.

Hip hip! Hooray! So very proud of my hard working hubster. More on that I'm sure later.

Goals for 2014's Spring & Summer:

(Of course there's a chance these all won't get done in the case that we do get a job and move out of state.)

1. Graduate. If we can just get to the end of April in one piece that's an accomplishment in itself.
2. Find a job. Big boy job hunting is harder than I thought. Especially when your husband is an engineer and you understand none of the job descriptions.
3. Find a place to live AND move there. Stressssssful. Until we get a job, we have no idea where we will be going. It could be across the country for all we know and we sure aren't ready.
4. Hike Y mountain at least one more time. 
5. Float the Provo River again.
6. Visit all the temples in Utah. 
7. 25 random acts of kindness
8. Write in my journal everyday for a month. 
9. Take a picture everyday for a month.
10. Finish a Shutterfly book of Haddie's first year.
11. Go through all my clothes and Haddie's and donate the ones we don't wear/need. 
12. Find at least 5 more vegetarian dishes that my family will eat and love.
13. Start a garden.
14. Take Haddie to the Spanish Fork Reservoir.
15. Paint.
16. Start and finish a book. Maybe even two!
17. Visit the Wishing Field.
18. Do some of the hundreds of crafts/recipes I have pinned on Pinterest.
19. Organize all my pictures and cards into a folder.
20. Fly a kite.
21. Go on a bike ride.
22. Go to the zoo/aquarium.
23. Learn a new skill.
24. Find an awesome hole in the wall place to eat. 
25. Write down something I'm grateful for everyday for a month.

Making YOURSELF a habit

Growing up I did every sport under the sun. Well, almost. Softball, soccer, gymnastics, cheerleading (it's totally a sport), track and field, ice skating, dance...I think you get it. I never had to worry about my body or being 'fit'.  I just was. I never worried about what I ate, how long I sat on the couch one day or how many calories was in a food or WHAT exactly was in what I was eating for that matter. Then after high school when you don't have a P.E class, dance class, or soccer practice to attend it very easily can just slip out of your day to day routine. Am I speaking for others here or is it just me? Well, I can say that for me, I slipped out of that real fast and never have I missed a P.E class more than I do right now.

It's true, friends. The older you get the slower your body and the harder you have to work to take care of it. Go ahead and say it, you're thinking it....it sucks. But that's part of life. I so badly wish I had kept up on my running, joined an intramurel team or at least stretched everyday! My body is paying for it now as I'm struggling to get it back to butt kicking shape by well, kicking my butt into shape. Hehe. See what I did there?

The last couple months I've been more conscience about what I'm putting into my body, how much I'm putting into it and working on my exercise habits. Meaning, I'm trying to make these things just that, habits. I've even started this thing called Oil Pulling. After reading that article you'll probably think I'm nuts but that's ok. I've been doing it for only four days now but I've already noticed a change in my moods, my teeth are whiter and I can tell you I KNOW it's been literally pulling and dissolving the bad toxins from my body. The other day I got a bad headache. It was just like a headache I once got after I had gone and gotten a massage. Have you ever been given a professional massage and afterwards they give you a big glass of chilled water? That's not just a complimentary beverage to keep you relaxed. It's to help flush all the nasty toxins that the deep tissue massage just helped release. If you don't flush those out you can get headaches and feel nauseous and I'm telling you that's EXACTLY why I felt so bad the other day. I didn't drink water when I was done.

Anyways, I'm rambling on now but what I'm getting at is that after being more careful and learning to love my body again I've noticed a change in myself. It may not be a drastic physical change but to be happy with yourself, the changes have to start from within and work outward. There certainly are changes taking place. I'm happier, I have more energy, I have a desire to do things again and the more I keep it up the more I get done and want to keep it up. It's amazing really. The 1000's of IU's of Vitamin D I take daily probably helps a bit too. ;) It's a lot like the idea people have that if you force a smile everyday eventually it'll be permanent and out of habit. The more I keep doing these beneficial things for myself and my body the more apart of my life it becomes and the better I feel inside and out. I'm slowly working out again, going to my Jazzercise classes, finding friends to do exercises with since that makes things SO much more fun, transitioning our diets from processed foods to almost no processed foods and drinking glass after glass of water everyday. It may not sound like much (or maybe it does) but I think it's important to find what works for you and the pace that works for you and your family. I've found mine! Finally.

So, I encourage you to find at least one or two things that you can change, starting today, or add to your daily routine that will benefit you. Make some goals. Maybe it'll be no soda for a month. Or waking up 30 minutes earlier to reflect or exercise. (I also think that it's so important to take a little time out of your day, each day, to have a quiet time of reflecting or unwinding.) Just find something that you think is possible and turn it into a habit! Then come back and tell me how it's going!
If you need a push or shove here and there from someone, let me know! I can be that person for you..gladly!

READY. SET. GO!! <3

The brilliant burrito

YOU GUYS.

Tonight I made what is quite possibly my new all time FAVORITE dish. Holy Smokes people. 

I just need to take a moment to relish in my accomplishment I made in the kitchen today. 

And yes, brag a little. At least I'm honest.

It was spicy and creamy, sweet and tender I'm seriously drooling all over again and WISHING my stomach wasn't already bulging so I could some how squeeze in some more of this stuff. Seriously. Good. Grub. 

Ok now that that's over with I will share this delictible dinner dish with you. For all my Utah friends, if you've ever had Cafe Rio (Which c'mon, you can't live in Utah and NOT have had it before) I'm talking about the sweet pork burrito. YES. I made something very similar to that and it was beyond easy. Especially for those of you in my boat and you have a miniature energizer bunny in human form bouncing off the walls everyday that can't even give you two minutes of alone time in the bathroom. 

If that's you, this meal is definitely for you. And really for anyone else too. 

We had a frozen pork roast in the freezer I pulled out this morning.

I'M AN AVID CROCKPOT USER.

All I did with it was put it in the crockpot with salsa and brown sugar. THAT'S IT. 

The pork was Delicious but what really made the meal was the divine avocado sauce I made to go along with it. Please make this. Please share it with your friends. (Unless you love it so much and can't imagine letting anyone else have the left overs. Well, then I'd completely understand.)

Pork Roast:

Place in the crockpot 

Add 16oz jar of salsa

Add 11/2 cups of brown sugar

Cook on HIGH 6-8 hours.

Easy peasy!

When it's about an hr away from being done shred it and stir it around a bit. Let it keep cooking and soak up all the juices. Mmm.

Avocado Sauce:

2 avocados

1 handful (about a cup) of fresh cilantro

1 juiced lime

1/2 cup sour cream

1 cup chicken stock

1 tsp minced garlic

1 tsp ground cumin

Finely minced jalepeno

A dash of salt and pepper

Blend it all together in the blender.

We made the burritos with black beans and cheese and next time I'll probably add some rice to it but it was soo good even without rice...and filling! I poured the sauce over the burrito but my husband put  it in his. If you want a little extra punch in the mouth add some Siracha sauce. However you prefer it! 

Roll up and enjoy! 

A lovely day o' love

 As we all know it was Valentine's Day the other day. A favorite holiday of mine! Well, I love every holiday but this one's definitely in my top 5ish! I seem to have this idea that when it's a holiday it should be celebrated all month instead of just the one day. So for Valentines that means red and pink heart outfits each day, cute head bands and lots of pictures. This day of love Emmett had classes so Haddiecakes and I dressed up and went shopping! While in the clothing  store (luckily there weren't more than 2 other customers at the time) sleepy Haddie decided she had an unnerving amount of energy all of a sudden and thought she had free rein of the entire place. She kicked her shoes off and ran and ran and ran, eventually putting holes in her tights. Luckily for me the sweet girls working were in high school and thought every little thing she did was "Just adorbs!" and "So presh!".  They danced in the mirrors with Hadds, chased her, picked her up. It was like having babysitters that let me do my shopping without being bugged. But of course they couldn't always keep an eye on her so there was a time she ran behind the counter and in the display windows, crawled under the changing room door (No, nobody was in there. Whew!) and she even dove head first into a clearance tub of high heels. Which then led to tears and a heel mark right in the middle of her forehead. I can easily say she napped very well when we got home. It sounds like I just let her run and cause chaos but of course I didn't did.

 You ever try shopping alone with a toddler? Yes? Then you know exactly how it goes.  No? Well, wait until you have children. Then you'll understand.

After her 2 1/2 hr nap (hallelujah!) we decided to do a mini photo shoot with our new camera. Keep in mind here, friends, that I have no editing programs except the old school one that came on my mac, that it's really hard to photograph a tot by yourself, it was getting dark and unfortunately I had no adorable props to use. Maybe next year will be better. Ha. 

The day started out with a heart/pink themed pancake breakfast! It's tradition!

Mr. Fletcher and I went out for a nice dinner to The Happy Sumo. Such good sushi! After dinner we sat in the car for a minute and discussed what we could do next. We had babysitters, dinner went faster than expected and it was only 7:30pm! We never did come up with anything so we just went home but it was an nice evening in relaxing and being with Haddie together.

This picture below was Valentine's Day last year. Haddie's first. I love it so much I decided I want to try and reenact it each year!

2013

2014

Hope you all had an enjoyable day with the ones you love and who love you! I'm so grateful for my eternal family!

Jazzercise milestones

I have a sweet friend, Candace, who just so happens to be a jazzercise instructor. She's been asking me to come to one of her classes and I really wanted to go but unfortunately things would keep coming up. So last night I finally was able to go and nerves were getting to me. I couldn't tell you why. Who is afraid of a little Jazzercise? Well, maybe the mom who hasn't worked out hard in years, who used to run a mile in 6 mins and now can't get around the block without wanting to pass out. Maybe the fact that my instructor is preggo and STILL rocking the stage, or the girl who never took dance classes in high school because she was too embarrassed and worried about what the other girls who had always been in dance would think of her. Yeahhh that'd be me, if you hadn't guessed by now. But I put on my big girl pants and marched down to the studio. Actually I just hitched a ride with Candace. 

I was worried I would have to stop a lot throughout it and that I'd be the one to look like a slobbery bulldog like this guy

while everyone else carried on like these women ----->

BUT I wasn't! I know I didn't look like these women or anywhere close. Really the only thing I have in common with them is the huge smile I had on my face throughout the entire class. I was really lovin' it.

Luckily I was able to get my sister in law, Andrea, to come without much convincing needed and she was able to bring our friend Carin along-with much more convincing. So that was nice to have some friends there to look silly with. Not that you guys looked silly or anything ;) No sillier than me at least! 

What I really loved about it was at no point was I feeling like I absolutely couldn't go any further. There were a few too many times that I wasn't keeping up because as soon as I'd have the moves finally down the song would be over and on to the next one haha. But it was fun to learn. But people, I'm telling you now, I'm hooked! I want to go back. I want to buy cute work out clothes and new shoes and go every week. Some of the moves I was thinking I wasn't feeling the burn where I should have been but boy do I feel sore this morning! I can't wait to go back! Your first time is free so you should totally come with me!! And then when you fall in love with it like I did it's only $10 a month-unlimited classes. (For students)

SnapChat, Selfies and Instagram-Oh my!

Oh come on. We've ALL done it. I remember back in the day when if you saw someone pull out their brick of a phone and snap a picture of themselves it was hilarious because they looked so down right ridiculous. Who just stands there and takes a picture of themselves? Ok, let's be real it's ALWAYS more than one picture. You have to check your angles, am I right? (Was your "double chin" showing?, The sun wasn't reflecting the beautiful blue in my eyes in that one, your lips weren't duck-like enough-take another). We've all been there. It's ok, no one is expecting you to admit it. Out loud anyway.

Well obviously over time things change and let's just say this, TIMES HAVE CHANGED, MY FRIENDS! It's still something we as people like to laugh at others for doing but we all still do it. Even though it's hard to believe, some people still don't own smart phones. They don't have Instagram or SnapChat. WHAT?! I know. I told you it might be hard to believe. But it's true. So when those without the social networks at their finger tips, burning holes in their pockets see us doing this it's still quiet humorous. Take my sweet husband for instance. When he sees me snap chatting someone he sees this:

The "Oh look at me-so cute and innocent" selfie

 The Miley Cyrus Selfie

 The "I can't get a good one might as well make it goofy" selfie

And the...actually I don't have a name for this one. Stink eye selfie? Sure. Roll with that one.

OK so not the most attractive of events taking place-I realize this. There, Hunny, is THAT what you wanted to hear? 



But what's really going on is I'm taking a perfectly acceptable picture like this:

Only, he's the one who knows they really turn out like this first:

I know you all know what I mean! Don't pretend you don't! And then here he is just making ridiculous faces AT me, laughing and thinking I'm the ridiculous one. Pssssh. He has some learning' to do ;) What he doesn't see are the faces HE'S making and how funny he looks. But still, even when I took pictures of those faces for him to see it was still me being the weirdo. Well, I'll let you be the judge.  Choose your side wisely.

He's reading over my shoulder now and saying that these are not the faces he makes but trust me, they are. Though he is right, a lot of the time he sits there staring at me with a look of, "What on Earth is going on with my Wifey over there?".

In the end, who cares. Yes, you, (we) look ridiculous but we all have our quirks ;)

Gifts of the Heart Exchange/blood bath.

Around here at BYU there is a huge event called, Gifts of the Heart Exchange. I had only found out about it a maybe a year ago. It's an activity students put together for student families in the area. You can go early to drop your unwanted items off and then come back to pick up whatever it is you need! Literally. Whatever it is you need. They have everything from baby gear (New strollers, car seats, bath tubs..) to house ware, clothing, toys, books etc. In the past when I've attended I've gotten a bag of clothes for Haddie, maybe a few pieces of clothing for Emmett and myself and maybe, if I was lucky, some other random piece of awesomeness. Like a mixer. I got a mixer last time.

Well last time I got there half an hr early and the line was already wrapping around the building! I brought two small bags and that was it. I remember seeing people walking out with bags and bags of stuff and strollers full of house hold items and things I know we could have really used. So this time? This time I went in with a game plan. Muahahaha! I scrapped myself up out of bed early, threw my hair up into a messy bun, and called it good. Well, I did get dressed, c'mon who do you think I am? I hauled our big stroller out to the car, in the snow, and went on to the church building it was being held at. I was an hr early and freezing my tookus off. I felt well prepared for this event this time around. I felt almost too prepared so I left our big stroller in the car and brought our small one. I couldn't look like I had been to too many of these now could I? I was 6th in line and so proud of myself. Until the frost bite started setting in and my toes felt like they had broken off inside my boot somewhere only to fall out once I took my boots off. (They aere still attached-don't worry). After an hr of waiting they finally opened the doors and that's when the blood bath started.

Ok so there wasn't really blood all over but if you've ever seen the Hunger Games, I picture it much like that. Everyone like wild animals pushing and shoving to get in, to get to the best stuff, to find the latest and greatest. Good thing I had my stroller and a game plan. (And my toes).  While in line I saw a lady walk in to donate a kids potty. Hadds has been showing lots of signs of being ready to potty train so I thought it'd be good to get one for her to see and get used to for a while before we started. Anyways, that was my go-to item. I dashed to the baby gear room and snatched that thing up like it was the last bag of apples in the arena! While there I found an uber nice-working-printer for Emmett and a lovely set of MATCHING salt and pepper shakers. That's a big deal, people. Now the room with all the stations set up with clothing are like the cornucopia. If you dare go in there you best watch out for hungry baby-clothing-wanting-momma bears ready to take anyone out who gets in their way. You might think I'm kidding but I'm beyond serious. They look like this:

And that's scary. But they were like 10x scarier. 

Well anyway I walked out of there weighed down in clothing, and good quality stuff we needed of freeeeeeeeeeeee ninety-nine!! And it was awesome. Happy days!

What happened Wed

Wednesday was a pretty normal day for the Fletcher Clan. Emmett was at school, Hadds and I were home playing and cleaning. Nothing out of the norm. Haddie played hard that day, took her normal naps, we ate nothing unusual for breakfast, lunch and snack times.
We were just about to start vacuuming when the men came home. (Emmett and Uncle Eric). After floors were cleaned and bellies were full we probably put on a movie.
   
When 4:30 rolled around soon after I left to go nanny. The kids and I read stories, played Wii, practiced music, homework, did hand stands and 'exercised'. We had BLTs for dinner and I was home by 8:30. Hadds and I did our standard bedtime routine. Jammies, story, song, snuggles and bed. 10pm-ish came around and I went to bed. I remember laying in bed trying to go to sleep but my tummy just felt...different. I felt like I needed to puke. Sometimes that happens though so I tried to ignore it. I fell asleep but was still in that weird in-between sleep and being awake mode and puking was still on my mind.

Then out of nowhere I jumped out of bed and screamed, "EMMETT!! EMMETT, HADDIE IS CHOKING!!" I ran to her room and sure enough my little nugget was face down in her own vomit gasping and crying. A mother just knows these things. I picked her up and rushed to the bathroom where Emmett met us and she continued to gag in the bathtub. Then.....I leaned over to the sink and tossed all my own cookies. My poor brother in law and our friend Daniel were in the living room when this was taking place and they had snuck out ever so quietly. Who could blame them? Then poor Emmett...he had two sick gals on his hands and well, only two hands. I was fending for myself while he took care of the Hadds.

This went on a lot of the night. errr, early morning. I was summoned to the couch and Emmett had Haddie in our bed with him. I could hear Haddie whimpering and I couldn't do anything for her. Heck, I couldn't do anything for myself! Until a thought came to me. A BLESSING! Duhhh. So I asked Emmett to give me one and he went to his sister's house, who is luckily our neighbor, (this was at 2am btw) and got our brother in law to give me one so he could hang on to Haddie.

I've always loved blessings. Never have I been given a sickness blessing and felt it work right away though. This time was different. While Aaron was giving me the blessing I was holding my rather large puke bowl and thinking "Please don't barf now... please don't barf now" because I felt like it was about to happen. As soon as it was over, I felt a million times better and I didn't get sick again. He gave one to Haddie too and she never got sick again either! In fact, she went right to sleep, and the next morning was almost her spunky self again, dancing and playing but still very tired. It wasn't until later in the afternoon she had a very bloated tummy and was in lots of pain, crying for hours and nothing was helping her. I ended up taking her to the dr but by then she was a lot better. The nurse looked her over and talked with me a lot and didn't even charge us!

Last night was a rough one for me though. Felt queasy, drained, couldn't eat anything and all I wanted was ice cream. Which I never got and still want, by the way haha. I took cat naps all day, then an hr long nap at 7 and went to bed at about 8 and slept until after 10 this morning. That's A TON of sleep people! That has to be a record for how long a mom gets sleep. Right? Well this morning I'm loads better and so is Haddie. She's a wee bit of a crank today though. But who could blame her?

Well, that post was a lot longer on barfing than I had anticipated. If you made it this far, good for you, and thanks! Till next time!

Oh, Hey there, New Year.

I know, I know. It's been a little long since my last post and we didn't leave on the best of notes. Depression. Who has time for THAT!?

This year, though it's only been barely an entire month, has been one of our bests around here lately. We have some amazing things to look forward to this year, so much to be grateful for and so much we are excited to work on. Together. As a family. Just to catch you up and not leave you hanging, wondering what could she possibly be talking about (looking forward to whhhatt??) I'l fill you in.


It's Emmett's last, yes, LAST, semester!!! WHHHAAATTT!? That means easy peasy classes and more time at home. Seriously, I couldn't have asked for anything more. Haddiecakes loves to have 'Daduuuhh' home with us too. He's job searching so pray for us and wish us luck please!

We've made some wonderful friends recently. Friendships we hope will last even when it's time to leave the Utah bubble. Mommy and mommy-to-be friends have really helped me grow (No, I don't mean taller. Let's be real that kind of growth for me is loooong gone) but grow as a mommy and learn a lot. I'm grateful for them and getting me out of the house more. I've made it a point to get out of the house at least once a day. Maybe for a walk, trip to the library whatever it may be and that has helped tremendously. 

We've made resolutions and so far stuck with those.  Some are silly, some are hard but we are proud of our new goals and commitments. 

I can say proudly and honestly say that I am happier than I have been in a long time. It really has been due to my attitude adjustment, exercise and eating better. Can I get a Hallelujah?!

I cut about 11 inches of my hair off. It may sound silly but that alone has made me feel like I can accomplish anything. It was a huge step for me. I marched over to me sister in laws and said, "How do you feel about spontaneous decisions?", and BAM! Haircut. 

Haddie:

In a matter of weeks her vocabulary has soared and she runs...FAST! Some of her favorite words are: Uh-Oh, Yeah, Mama, Daduuuhh, Hot, Ahhh (after taking drinks), ball, up, woah, ME! ME! ME! ME! ME! (for when she wants something for her) and some others she doesn't say quiet as much. It's exciting! 

She has met some friends her age and loves to have them around to run and play with. I'm SO so glad we have some youngins around so she can have playmates her age. Her favorite activities include: going up and down stairs-by herself, dancing, twirling in circles over and over and over and over and I'm totally not exaggerating how much she spins in circles, going outside, sliding, playing with other kids, reading books, she recently starting singing and humming, climbing on and into everything, drawing, climbing on our table and dancing in our window, hide and seek, chase, and she loves to clean! Thank goodness for that. She sweeps with me, holds the dust pan for me, pushes the vacuum around the living room while it's on, washes her hands and wipes her mouth after eating (or just for fun) and flushing the toilet. 

Here's a funny story for you. Haddie has a good friend who happens to be our neighbor, they are only about 8 days apart and really get along well. In church on Sunday we got there a little late so we had to sit in the back when normally we are in the front. Her friend came from behind us with some graham crackers to share. We were near an open space so it was ok for them to walk around where we were. So this little friend starts laying down the crackers on the floor and backing up. Haddie climbed off me to grab the cracker and found herself following a trail of crackers made by her friend. It was so funny! They chatted it up, walked around, played and then out of no where Hadds decides to make a break for it. She ran all the way up the isle to the front of the church and headed straight for the piano. I was a ways behind her speed walking as fast as my little legs would allow looking at the ground and trying not to make eye contact when I hear LOUD piano keys being played. Of course there is my daughter on her tip toes banging on the piano, all eyes on her when a poor sister is just trying to giver her talk. I said, "Haddie, this isn't YOUR time, this is HER time" and of course people around me heard and laughed. Embarrassing but a story I'll cherish forever. Kid loves her music. She attempted this at least two more times before the end of our service. 

Well, that's all for now folks! (:

Tested Tried and Tired but doing so cheerfully

Today was one of the very best days I've had in a long time. I really felt God's love for me today in some of the most unexpected ways. For a long time, probably since Haddie has been born, I felt like God had forgotten about me or just had me set aside on the back burner. I've been struggling with the dark battle of depression, not really being able to pinpoint it on any one thing. In my mind I just thought people were dealing with much bigger issues than I was so God didn't need to worry about me as much. I know He loves me but I needed to FEEL it again. I can see now that He has been putting things in my path like, "Helloooo?? Danica, LOOK, RIGHT HERE!! This is me helping you, guiding you, I'm listening, now listen to me!!" The only two people who know I have been battling this is my darling, supportive husband and my loving mother. My husband getting the worst of it. Picking fights, crying episodes, messy apartment, struggling with my testimony, the list goes on. I'm really ashamed of how I have acted. But, I suppose it's all part of the process.

I keep thinking to myself, "I didn't sign up for this." "This is not how it's supposed to be." But I still don't know what I have been expecting. This last month I have been hit hard with direction, love and support but was so hung up on "This is just what I have to live with and how it's going to be" that I was missing all the signs of help. How many life savers can God throw a drowning person before He just gives up and  thinks, "Well, she obviously doesn't want the help and can fix it herself, I'm done trying."? The answer? The only answer is, as many as He needs to until you finally put on that dang life jacket and hop in the boat! I feel so silly for sitting there with a hundred life jackets around me, I'm drowning and still trying to flap my arms around to keep my head above water. I'm tired and exhausted.

   Emmett and I were just talking to our Home Teachers today, two members  of the church who come to visit us each month and share a spiritual message. A lot of the time home teachers will ask how you are, if there is anything they can do for us. Well, the obvious answer is that I'm good and no, we don't need anything but thanks for asking. Which of course is what I always said. But really I'm screaming inside saying I needed help but I didn't know with what and I'm not doing too well but I can't tell you why, because I don't know! Depression is a real thing. A huge percentage of people deal with it everyday. We got on this subject with our home teachers, it was the first time I openly discussed this 'problem' with anyone outside my husband and mother, in much depth. I finally felt free. I was expecting for it to just disappear, cat's out of the bag, we're all good here now! But unfortunately it doesn't work like that. I told them this: Struggling with depression is like walking around with a missing limb. Apart of me just didn't feel 'normal'.  I was afraid people would look and think of me as a person with a handicap if anyone knew what I was trying to overcome. I had to be the ONLY one dealing with this. Truth is, I can't do it alone. In reality, having depression or missing a limb is NOT a handicap and if you talk to anyone living with one of these or the other would probably agree. I'm the only one who can make it a handicap, and I have been. It became an excuse. Well, obviously it's not a good day for me so I can't do the dishes. I can't make dinner.  I can't move from the couch. I can't read my scriptures, say my prayers or actively participate in Family Home Evening. I just CAN'T feel the spirit anymore. I made a deal with my Heavenly Father when I was baptized into The Church Of Jesus Christ Of Latter Day Saints. I would keep the commandments, read my scriptures, pray everyday, love others, serve others, go to the temple often, love my family, TRUST IN HIM and in return He would lead me, guide me, walk beside me, help me find the way. And most of all, LOVE ME. 

I felt short changed this last year. Where's the spirit and love I felt when I was baptized and the acceptance this last yr or so? Well, looking back now, who wasn't keeping their half of the bargain? ME. I have everything and everyone I need right in front of me and these people and things just keep knocking on my door like, "Hey! Let's count your blessings!"Life line after life line. I had been asked to speak in church (which gets me really nervous) and I shared stories straight from my journal about my conversion and the love Heavenly Father has for me. I cried. I felt His presence so much in my life right then but I guess that still wasn't enough of a wake up call to me. Tonight the sisters in my ward (church community) had a fireside, a spiritual thought from a couple speakers. Some sisters bravely shared their heartbreaking experiences they have had to overcome, and really, in a mind boggling sort of way, were blessed with. They shared how these trials brought them closer to the Lord, even if at first, and even for many years later, they felt abandoned by Him. The room was strong with the spirit and heavy hearts. But I know each and every person in that room left with a lifted spirit and a brighter hope. If I'm wrong, I can at least say that I sure came out a new person. Refreshed. I know it's ok, and actually a positive thing, to share our stories with others. Especially if it means you can help someone in some way or another and find others going through what you are too. Tonight, so many women connected with others they maybe had never even talked to before and because of that, love spread like wildfire and the ever so dim light of hope sparked a fire again. A few of my favorite words of hope expressed tonight were these and I hope they bring you as much comfort as they did me.

"This will NOT beat me! I will NOT be a victim!"

"How did you overcome it?"

"I was on my knees and in the scriptures...A LOT."

"The Lord has a plan for me. Shall I falter or shall I finish?"

"I shall finish."

"And it came....to PASS."

 We may not all be going through something as tragic as losing a child, or battling cancer, but our trials are real. Some harder than others. But that does not mean that our Heavely Father can't feel our pain or loves us any less. It doesn't mean He is leaving us behind thinking we can't keep up so we might as well forfeit life.  I'm humbly writing this now, but I know I'll have days, probably sooner than I'd like to admit, that I'll feel low and lonely again but I know I'm not. I know if I hold up my end of the bargain that my Heavenly Father will too. And even if I don't, He will continue to keep his foot in the door and and maybe give me a kick or two, throwing life lines left and right until I finally snatch one and accept the help. I'm grateful for the trials I have had in my life. A lot that will be lifelong battles, that make me dreary somedays, but because I know I have a loving husband, family and extended family, a spiritual family, that will never leave me alone. I know that whatever trials we are enduring, we need to keep enduring till the end. That there WILL be an end, and we are bigger than them. Come unto Christ and we can overcome anything, better and stronger than when we went into them. Serving others brings hope, spreads love and can present the most humbling of experiences. I know that no matter how many life lines we let drift off and crash in the waves of our trials that there will always be another thrown our way. It's up to us to prepare ourselves for those the best that we can. It's important to ask for help when needed. This does NOT make you a weaker person. It's also important for us to let God use us as His tools, His life lines, like these women did for me tonight. He loves us SO much, we are literally children of God and He wants to help us. He wants the best for us. He trusts us to make our own decisions. We already made the best one by deciding to come to Earth to live this life, knowing we were to be tried and tested. We must do everything we can to return to our Heavenly Father. 

YOU ARE NOT ALONE IN THIS.

Doctrine and Covenants 78:17-18:

"Verily, verily, I say unto you, ye are little children, and ye have not as yet understood how great the blessings the Father hath in his own hands and prepared for you;

And ye cannot bear all things now; nevertheless, BE OF GOOD CHEER, for I will lead you along. The kingdom is yours and the blessings thereof are yours, and the riches of eternity are yours."

PS, I love you all. That's why you should read this talk.

http://www.lds.org/general-conference/2013/10/like-a-broken-vessel?lang=eng

Death by cookies: How I survived

Ok so a few months ago I got what I thought could possibly be the most brilliant idea ever. 

(Which it turned out that it WAS the most brilliant idea ever). 

PEANUT BUTTER-CHOCOLATE CHIP-PRETZEL COOKIES.

When I ran this idea by my husband, who is a sweet-a-holic, he didn't look very sold on the idea. The only thing he said was, "Pretzels?" YES! Yes, pretzels! Let the record show that when his sister tried these she had said that the pretzel is what made the whole cookie! So since his reaction was not what I had expected I ditched the idea for a while. Until a few nights ago that is. 

We had just moved into our new place, with our things ALMOST all put away. I was on top of my game with dinner done, cleaned and on a roll in my new kitchen when I had a hankering for baking. 

Emmett's brother and his friend were over and they were totally lost in their multiplayer game so I just got started. When I had asked the guys if they smelled cookies they all perked up from the computer screens real quick! When I told them what kind of cookies I was baking they seemed uninterested at that point. I was determined to make them believers. 

(Two out of the three converted to my pretzel ways and the one that didn't was only because he doesn't like chocolate!)

After posting on my Instagram and Facebook about my new creation I had many friends asking for the recipe. Well friends, here it is! 

I did look up a recipe for reference but like everything else I just made it my own. 

So feel free to change, add or take away whatever you feel is necessary.

• 1 1/2 cups of all purpose flour
• 1/2 tsp. of salt
• 1/4 tsp. of baking powder
• 1/2 cup of butter at room temperature
• 1/2 cup of tightly packed light brown sugar
• 1/3 cup of granulated sugar
• 1 egg 
• 1 tsp vanilla extract
• 1 cup milk chocolate chips
• 1/2 cup peanut butter 
• 1/2 cup broken up pretzel pieces     

DIRECTIONS:

Pre-heat oven to 350 degrees

1. In a med bowl combine flour, salt and baking powder and set aside.

2. In a larger bowl add butter and both sugars and mix until fluffy. Once fluffed add the egg, vanilla and peanut butter to the mix.

3. Add the flour mixture SLOWLY. (I mixed it in about a 1/2 cup at a time.)

4. Once that is completely mixed in add the best parts! (choc chips and pretzels)

A couple of the recipes I came across said to cover and refrigerate for an hour but if you're like me and just can't wait-don't bother. I didn't and they were perfect still.

5. Place small balls of dough on a cookie sheet. (They really don't need much space between them because they don't flatten out much. Mine were pretty crammed on there and didn't touch after baking a while.) Bake for about 10 mins. (I baked them about 10 and they were ever so slightly crunchy on the outside but soft, chewy and dreamy on the inside. MMmmMMMmm) 

The death by cookie was me indulging as many of these as I could in a span of 5 minutes. How I survived? Well, I decided I'd share. So if you find yourself scarfing down too many of these I suggest passing some out-if you have the will power. Yes, seriously, they are THAT good! Enjoy, friends!

REVAMP-A-TIZE me Capn'

Since my post about the newly revamped night stand/end table I did I received a TON of positive feedback! I had numerous amounts of people telling me that they would buy something like that and that I should start a small business. Well folks, I'm pleased to announce...

I TOOK YOUR ADVICE!!

Recycled Refurbished Revamped is up and running.

Well, it's more like a slow walk eh, becoming a jog?

Well you get it. I'm just getting started and I'd love the help. 

It's all about making your old items new again. Recycling. Revamping. I will hopefully have people bringing me their furnishings/items and we can go over a personal and custom made design, but I'd also like to have items up for sale as well.

So if you could, "Like" the page and spread the word!

I'm hoping to do a few more projects soon so I can have more examples of my work. I'd really like to be able to sell a few of these items soon so I can continue the work. 

Also, any and all advice is welcomed. Just be nice about it aye? ;) 

People are always doing give aways and such and I want to try something out like that eventually but I need to be able to pay for the shipping. 

So basically, any ideas are encouraged :) 

Thank you all for the help, the support and I hope this thing works out. I know with all your help it could be so great!

Chicken Dinner Especial

Tired from work or school ALL day?

Just need a break?

But still have a family of mouths to feed?

Well here is your answer to those problems! 

I decided to whip up something for dinner tonight that would be quick and easy. The oven did most the cooking and that's the way I like it. 

In our home we almost NEVER use a recipe. I just think up the ingredients I have/want and figure out what I can concoct from it all. As far as measurements go, ehh well that's a guessing game as well. 

But let me tell ya I have yet to find something that I absolutely could not swallow or finish and my husband is my biggest critic when it comes to food. If he eats it, I know it was ok, if he has 2 servings I know he liked it and if he has more than 2 servings and cant seem to do anything but lay down after the meal I know he LOVED it :)

This would be a loved meal.

Let's get back on topic here. Ok so tonight I wanted something simple, easy and delish and luckily got all three! Thought I'd share it with you, you lucky dog ;)

Guys, Imma be honest with you.  NEVER have I made chicken as tender as I did this one. It literally would melt in my mouth. Ok just saying! Onward!

I didn't plan on blogging about this venture so I dont have any pictures of the process. But I have an aftermath one that is poorly taken from my horrible camera phone. Enjoy!

Here's what you'll need: 

(This recipe was almost overfilling our 9x13 in casserole dish.)

2 cups cooked rice

3 small chicken breasts thawed

Half an onion chopped

3 SMALL jalepenos finely chopped

Half a small bag of frozen broccoli

2 cans cream of chicken soup (I used 10.5 oz)

1 packet onion soup mix

1/2 cup italian bread crumbs

PREP:

Set oven to 350 degrees.

First I cooked the rice. 

Mix the bread crumbs and onion soup mix in a small bowl and set aside.

While the rice was cooking I began slicing and dicing. I cut up the chicken into small strips and cubes.

I chopped the onion and the jalepenos.

Place the chicken in the crumby mixture and make sure to get all sides completely covered. 

Look at this like a lasagna. Layer on layer..

I poured in some of the chicken juice at the bottom of the dish for extra moisture then I added the rice to cover the bottom.

Next, pour out the cream of chicken soup and spread evenly over the rice. 

Add the chicken on top.

Pour over the broccoli, onion and peppers. 

I sprinkled the top with maybe a tsp of garlic powder and cayenne pepper.

(This dish was spicy! We like it that way but if you don't I would leave out the cayenne pepper OR the jalepenos)

I covered it with tin foil and baked it for exactly an hour. No shorter, no longer.

This all took me maybe 15 mins of prep time and then the hour of having the oven do all the cooking. I pretty much sat my bum on the couch thinking of all the cleaning I should have been getting done while it baked. 

Can I get an "Ovens amen!"?

(Ovens amen? Yep, it's passed my bed time)