Tested Tried and Tired but doing so cheerfully

Today was one of the very best days I've had in a long time. I really felt God's love for me today in some of the most unexpected ways. For a long time, probably since Haddie has been born, I felt like God had forgotten about me or just had me set aside on the back burner. I've been struggling with the dark battle of depression, not really being able to pinpoint it on any one thing. In my mind I just thought people were dealing with much bigger issues than I was so God didn't need to worry about me as much. I know He loves me but I needed to FEEL it again. I can see now that He has been putting things in my path like, "Helloooo?? Danica, LOOK, RIGHT HERE!! This is me helping you, guiding you, I'm listening, now listen to me!!" The only two people who know I have been battling this is my darling, supportive husband and my loving mother. My husband getting the worst of it. Picking fights, crying episodes, messy apartment, struggling with my testimony, the list goes on. I'm really ashamed of how I have acted. But, I suppose it's all part of the process.

I keep thinking to myself, "I didn't sign up for this." "This is not how it's supposed to be." But I still don't know what I have been expecting. This last month I have been hit hard with direction, love and support but was so hung up on "This is just what I have to live with and how it's going to be" that I was missing all the signs of help. How many life savers can God throw a drowning person before He just gives up and  thinks, "Well, she obviously doesn't want the help and can fix it herself, I'm done trying."? The answer? The only answer is, as many as He needs to until you finally put on that dang life jacket and hop in the boat! I feel so silly for sitting there with a hundred life jackets around me, I'm drowning and still trying to flap my arms around to keep my head above water. I'm tired and exhausted.

   Emmett and I were just talking to our Home Teachers today, two members  of the church who come to visit us each month and share a spiritual message. A lot of the time home teachers will ask how you are, if there is anything they can do for us. Well, the obvious answer is that I'm good and no, we don't need anything but thanks for asking. Which of course is what I always said. But really I'm screaming inside saying I needed help but I didn't know with what and I'm not doing too well but I can't tell you why, because I don't know! Depression is a real thing. A huge percentage of people deal with it everyday. We got on this subject with our home teachers, it was the first time I openly discussed this 'problem' with anyone outside my husband and mother, in much depth. I finally felt free. I was expecting for it to just disappear, cat's out of the bag, we're all good here now! But unfortunately it doesn't work like that. I told them this: Struggling with depression is like walking around with a missing limb. Apart of me just didn't feel 'normal'.  I was afraid people would look and think of me as a person with a handicap if anyone knew what I was trying to overcome. I had to be the ONLY one dealing with this. Truth is, I can't do it alone. In reality, having depression or missing a limb is NOT a handicap and if you talk to anyone living with one of these or the other would probably agree. I'm the only one who can make it a handicap, and I have been. It became an excuse. Well, obviously it's not a good day for me so I can't do the dishes. I can't make dinner.  I can't move from the couch. I can't read my scriptures, say my prayers or actively participate in Family Home Evening. I just CAN'T feel the spirit anymore. I made a deal with my Heavenly Father when I was baptized into The Church Of Jesus Christ Of Latter Day Saints. I would keep the commandments, read my scriptures, pray everyday, love others, serve others, go to the temple often, love my family, TRUST IN HIM and in return He would lead me, guide me, walk beside me, help me find the way. And most of all, LOVE ME. 

I felt short changed this last year. Where's the spirit and love I felt when I was baptized and the acceptance this last yr or so? Well, looking back now, who wasn't keeping their half of the bargain? ME. I have everything and everyone I need right in front of me and these people and things just keep knocking on my door like, "Hey! Let's count your blessings!"Life line after life line. I had been asked to speak in church (which gets me really nervous) and I shared stories straight from my journal about my conversion and the love Heavenly Father has for me. I cried. I felt His presence so much in my life right then but I guess that still wasn't enough of a wake up call to me. Tonight the sisters in my ward (church community) had a fireside, a spiritual thought from a couple speakers. Some sisters bravely shared their heartbreaking experiences they have had to overcome, and really, in a mind boggling sort of way, were blessed with. They shared how these trials brought them closer to the Lord, even if at first, and even for many years later, they felt abandoned by Him. The room was strong with the spirit and heavy hearts. But I know each and every person in that room left with a lifted spirit and a brighter hope. If I'm wrong, I can at least say that I sure came out a new person. Refreshed. I know it's ok, and actually a positive thing, to share our stories with others. Especially if it means you can help someone in some way or another and find others going through what you are too. Tonight, so many women connected with others they maybe had never even talked to before and because of that, love spread like wildfire and the ever so dim light of hope sparked a fire again. A few of my favorite words of hope expressed tonight were these and I hope they bring you as much comfort as they did me.

"This will NOT beat me! I will NOT be a victim!"

"How did you overcome it?"

"I was on my knees and in the scriptures...A LOT."

"The Lord has a plan for me. Shall I falter or shall I finish?"

"I shall finish."

"And it came....to PASS."

 We may not all be going through something as tragic as losing a child, or battling cancer, but our trials are real. Some harder than others. But that does not mean that our Heavely Father can't feel our pain or loves us any less. It doesn't mean He is leaving us behind thinking we can't keep up so we might as well forfeit life.  I'm humbly writing this now, but I know I'll have days, probably sooner than I'd like to admit, that I'll feel low and lonely again but I know I'm not. I know if I hold up my end of the bargain that my Heavenly Father will too. And even if I don't, He will continue to keep his foot in the door and and maybe give me a kick or two, throwing life lines left and right until I finally snatch one and accept the help. I'm grateful for the trials I have had in my life. A lot that will be lifelong battles, that make me dreary somedays, but because I know I have a loving husband, family and extended family, a spiritual family, that will never leave me alone. I know that whatever trials we are enduring, we need to keep enduring till the end. That there WILL be an end, and we are bigger than them. Come unto Christ and we can overcome anything, better and stronger than when we went into them. Serving others brings hope, spreads love and can present the most humbling of experiences. I know that no matter how many life lines we let drift off and crash in the waves of our trials that there will always be another thrown our way. It's up to us to prepare ourselves for those the best that we can. It's important to ask for help when needed. This does NOT make you a weaker person. It's also important for us to let God use us as His tools, His life lines, like these women did for me tonight. He loves us SO much, we are literally children of God and He wants to help us. He wants the best for us. He trusts us to make our own decisions. We already made the best one by deciding to come to Earth to live this life, knowing we were to be tried and tested. We must do everything we can to return to our Heavenly Father. 

YOU ARE NOT ALONE IN THIS.

Doctrine and Covenants 78:17-18:

"Verily, verily, I say unto you, ye are little children, and ye have not as yet understood how great the blessings the Father hath in his own hands and prepared for you;

And ye cannot bear all things now; nevertheless, BE OF GOOD CHEER, for I will lead you along. The kingdom is yours and the blessings thereof are yours, and the riches of eternity are yours."

PS, I love you all. That's why you should read this talk.

http://www.lds.org/general-conference/2013/10/like-a-broken-vessel?lang=eng

Death by cookies: How I survived

Ok so a few months ago I got what I thought could possibly be the most brilliant idea ever. 

(Which it turned out that it WAS the most brilliant idea ever). 

PEANUT BUTTER-CHOCOLATE CHIP-PRETZEL COOKIES.

When I ran this idea by my husband, who is a sweet-a-holic, he didn't look very sold on the idea. The only thing he said was, "Pretzels?" YES! Yes, pretzels! Let the record show that when his sister tried these she had said that the pretzel is what made the whole cookie! So since his reaction was not what I had expected I ditched the idea for a while. Until a few nights ago that is. 

We had just moved into our new place, with our things ALMOST all put away. I was on top of my game with dinner done, cleaned and on a roll in my new kitchen when I had a hankering for baking. 

Emmett's brother and his friend were over and they were totally lost in their multiplayer game so I just got started. When I had asked the guys if they smelled cookies they all perked up from the computer screens real quick! When I told them what kind of cookies I was baking they seemed uninterested at that point. I was determined to make them believers. 

(Two out of the three converted to my pretzel ways and the one that didn't was only because he doesn't like chocolate!)

After posting on my Instagram and Facebook about my new creation I had many friends asking for the recipe. Well friends, here it is! 

I did look up a recipe for reference but like everything else I just made it my own. 

So feel free to change, add or take away whatever you feel is necessary.

• 1 1/2 cups of all purpose flour
• 1/2 tsp. of salt
• 1/4 tsp. of baking powder
• 1/2 cup of butter at room temperature
• 1/2 cup of tightly packed light brown sugar
• 1/3 cup of granulated sugar
• 1 egg 
• 1 tsp vanilla extract
• 1 cup milk chocolate chips
• 1/2 cup peanut butter 
• 1/2 cup broken up pretzel pieces     

DIRECTIONS:

Pre-heat oven to 350 degrees

1. In a med bowl combine flour, salt and baking powder and set aside.

2. In a larger bowl add butter and both sugars and mix until fluffy. Once fluffed add the egg, vanilla and peanut butter to the mix.

3. Add the flour mixture SLOWLY. (I mixed it in about a 1/2 cup at a time.)

4. Once that is completely mixed in add the best parts! (choc chips and pretzels)

A couple of the recipes I came across said to cover and refrigerate for an hour but if you're like me and just can't wait-don't bother. I didn't and they were perfect still.

5. Place small balls of dough on a cookie sheet. (They really don't need much space between them because they don't flatten out much. Mine were pretty crammed on there and didn't touch after baking a while.) Bake for about 10 mins. (I baked them about 10 and they were ever so slightly crunchy on the outside but soft, chewy and dreamy on the inside. MMmmMMMmm) 

The death by cookie was me indulging as many of these as I could in a span of 5 minutes. How I survived? Well, I decided I'd share. So if you find yourself scarfing down too many of these I suggest passing some out-if you have the will power. Yes, seriously, they are THAT good! Enjoy, friends!

REVAMP-A-TIZE me Capn'

Since my post about the newly revamped night stand/end table I did I received a TON of positive feedback! I had numerous amounts of people telling me that they would buy something like that and that I should start a small business. Well folks, I'm pleased to announce...

I TOOK YOUR ADVICE!!

Recycled Refurbished Revamped is up and running.

Well, it's more like a slow walk eh, becoming a jog?

Well you get it. I'm just getting started and I'd love the help. 

It's all about making your old items new again. Recycling. Revamping. I will hopefully have people bringing me their furnishings/items and we can go over a personal and custom made design, but I'd also like to have items up for sale as well.

So if you could, "Like" the page and spread the word!

I'm hoping to do a few more projects soon so I can have more examples of my work. I'd really like to be able to sell a few of these items soon so I can continue the work. 

Also, any and all advice is welcomed. Just be nice about it aye? ;) 

People are always doing give aways and such and I want to try something out like that eventually but I need to be able to pay for the shipping. 

So basically, any ideas are encouraged :) 

Thank you all for the help, the support and I hope this thing works out. I know with all your help it could be so great!

Chicken Dinner Especial

Tired from work or school ALL day?

Just need a break?

But still have a family of mouths to feed?

Well here is your answer to those problems! 

I decided to whip up something for dinner tonight that would be quick and easy. The oven did most the cooking and that's the way I like it. 

In our home we almost NEVER use a recipe. I just think up the ingredients I have/want and figure out what I can concoct from it all. As far as measurements go, ehh well that's a guessing game as well. 

But let me tell ya I have yet to find something that I absolutely could not swallow or finish and my husband is my biggest critic when it comes to food. If he eats it, I know it was ok, if he has 2 servings I know he liked it and if he has more than 2 servings and cant seem to do anything but lay down after the meal I know he LOVED it :)

This would be a loved meal.

Let's get back on topic here. Ok so tonight I wanted something simple, easy and delish and luckily got all three! Thought I'd share it with you, you lucky dog ;)

Guys, Imma be honest with you.  NEVER have I made chicken as tender as I did this one. It literally would melt in my mouth. Ok just saying! Onward!

I didn't plan on blogging about this venture so I dont have any pictures of the process. But I have an aftermath one that is poorly taken from my horrible camera phone. Enjoy!

Here's what you'll need: 

(This recipe was almost overfilling our 9x13 in casserole dish.)

2 cups cooked rice

3 small chicken breasts thawed

Half an onion chopped

3 SMALL jalepenos finely chopped

Half a small bag of frozen broccoli

2 cans cream of chicken soup (I used 10.5 oz)

1 packet onion soup mix

1/2 cup italian bread crumbs

PREP:

Set oven to 350 degrees.

First I cooked the rice. 

Mix the bread crumbs and onion soup mix in a small bowl and set aside.

While the rice was cooking I began slicing and dicing. I cut up the chicken into small strips and cubes.

I chopped the onion and the jalepenos.

Place the chicken in the crumby mixture and make sure to get all sides completely covered. 

Look at this like a lasagna. Layer on layer..

I poured in some of the chicken juice at the bottom of the dish for extra moisture then I added the rice to cover the bottom.

Next, pour out the cream of chicken soup and spread evenly over the rice. 

Add the chicken on top.

Pour over the broccoli, onion and peppers. 

I sprinkled the top with maybe a tsp of garlic powder and cayenne pepper.

(This dish was spicy! We like it that way but if you don't I would leave out the cayenne pepper OR the jalepenos)

I covered it with tin foil and baked it for exactly an hour. No shorter, no longer.

This all took me maybe 15 mins of prep time and then the hour of having the oven do all the cooking. I pretty much sat my bum on the couch thinking of all the cleaning I should have been getting done while it baked. 

Can I get an "Ovens amen!"?

(Ovens amen? Yep, it's passed my bed time)

Revamped

As we all know I have been fighting a cold for almost two weeks. Finally I went to the Dr and they told me I have the symptoms of Bronchitis. Luckily I was prescribed some AMAZING cough syrup and it started helping the very first day. That was about 3 days ago. I'm not 100% yet but my voice is back and I have some much missed energy!

In fact, today I was able to do some errands. My poor Haddie Cakes is sick and my sweet hubby too so they stayed home to sleep. While out and about I came across a yard sale where they had lots of furniture pieces. One stuck out to me amongst the others. It was only $2 and within 5 minutes of contemplating it was bought. By yours truly. 

I have been wanting to try refurbishing a piece of furniture for a long time and I finally had the opportunity! So I went to WalMart and bought some paint and sand paper, got home and started my adventure.

Not so pretty, but it had potential!

I started by using the sandpaper on the top. Once it was smooth I cleaned her up and started painting. 

It looks more lavender in these pictures but the paint I used is called Sanctuary Rose.

And here she is! I'm pretty much in love with er'. First time I've ever attempted Chevron anything. She just needs some new knobs and she will be good to go! I've also been thinking I will one day get some pretty wallpaper and line the drawers. I can't wait to put it in our new home!

#PROUDOFMYSESLF

Honey & Cinnamon Suicide

As some of you may know (and have sadly witnessed) I got sick last week and have since lost my voice. Scratchy throat + sore throat + cough =no voice  and that pathetic equation = a sad Danica. 

This morning I got this bright idea to hunt down a cure. I have been chugg-a-luggin Chloreseptic spray and lets just all be grateful it's alcohol free or I'd be down for the count for suuure. It has not even helped a bit. I've inhaled steam like it's a cure for cancer, eaten way more popsicles than I'd like to admit and even tried the nasty Emergen-C stuff that you know I despise with my whole being.

So I went searching for a remedy that was sure to please and came across THIS site. 

Lets all sing together to the tune of that Mary Poppin's song about a spoon full of sugar.

"Honey and Cinnamon bound to make this girl more sound.." 

(Okay so I need to brush up on my song writing. Cut me a break I have NO voice!)

I read on that website that honey and cinnamon are the cure for many different ailments. One being a raspy throat. Well I figured if I got rid of this raspyness death then maybe my voice would come back. 

HA.

Even though Winnie the Pooh was my all time FAVORITE cartoon and I own EVERY Pooh movie ever created and know all the words to all those movies, Pooh and I sure do not have this one thing in common. Honey. I HATE HONEY.

With a passion. I avoid it all all costs but I do cook with it a lot making sure I can't taste it. 

Anyways, I read that if you try a Tbsp of this that it will cure the sore throat. I don't have any tea to put it in and I didn't think honey, cinnamon and warm water sounded very appealing so this is what I came up with. The website wasn't very specific on instructions. Just keep that in mind.

*FACE PALM*

I just mixed these two key ingredients and it went down the hatch!

Followed by 10 minutes of gagging my brains out and hovering over my kitchen sink trying to holler at Emmett to bring me something to drink. But again, I had no voice so it took some time to get him there. 

I proceeded to take a steamy hot shower and discreetly cry. 

After all this you might be wondering, "Well did it work?"

Let me just say this.

NO. NO NO NO NO NO! It did not. I'm still coughing up what's left of my lungs, chugging Chloreseptic spray and to top it all off I can actually feel this huge glop of honey sitting in the pit of my stomach.

Never again, my friends. Never again.

Maybe you will have better luck if you ever need to try this. 

What's in store for the Fletchers

IT'S AUGUST WHAT WHHHATTT!!

That means there are lots of new happenins' in store for this family this month.

For starts:

One of my bestest best friends is getting married to her bestest best friend/one of my "older brothers" and that means a trip to the homeland of San Diego! 

Also, I just got a new job. I'm a mommy's helper! Aka, nanny. It's perfect because it's for a darling family I already know, it's super close and I can bring Haddie with me so I don't have to work around Emmett's schedule. SCORE! I got another job right before I was offered this one and I would have been working more hours for almost the same pay. So now I work LESS hours, same pay and I get my baby to be with me. DOUBLE SCORE! I start this coming week :) 

Emmett's little brother is starting college here this fall so he will be coming down from Washington to live in Provo! That means that all the siblings will be here and it is going to be a blast! Mommy and Daddy Fletcher are bringing him down this month so it will be great to see them. I know Haddie is excited! 

And to top off the long list of the fun happenins' this month...

Are you ready? Its kind of a doozy...

WE ARE MOVING.

Yep, it's true. We have thought and prayed long and hard about this decision and it seems to be the best for us at this time. As much as we have come to love the people we have met while in this ward, there are many pros we had to consider. Like the fact that we will be much closer to campus so Emmett won't have to ride his bike in the snow for an hr, we will be closer to family etc. 

After the water incidents we've had in this place it's time. Haddie needs her own room again, we need our own room again. 

I hope we can still stay in contact with the friends we have made while living here. I'll sure miss all the boys in my primary class, they have taught me so much! Before all the tears come, we still have a month here!

I know the secret to happiness

Let's just get this out and nip it in the booty. 

I've been in some kind of a shlump lately. 

(And when I say lately I really mean like, a year.)

Nothing to do with my darling husband or my family. 

I feel like I have invested a lot of time into a lot of people with not much in return. But then when I came to realize it's not always about getting something in return, I did in fact gain something.

Happiness!

Nice intro yeah? 

I go to church every week and each time it always seems like someone somewhere mentions service. Helping others. Being kind. 

If you want to be happy, make someone else happy.

How many times does one person need to hear the same thing in so many different ways to finally get it through their head!? 

Apparently, a lot.

I can't stress enough how incredibly true this is. 

Just today I decided to go out of my way to say something nice to someone. Now I feel great!

I'm going to make this a daily thing. Whether it is in person, through Facebook, phone call...

I want to do a good deed or at LEAST lift someone's spirits everyday, without expecting something in return.

I'm telling you friends it has already turned my frown upside down today.

It doesn't have to be New Years to start a resolution. 

Get to it. 

MAKE MY DAY! 

(Or someone else's)

Welcome back!

Oh, um, hi.

Yes, It sure has been a while. Like months. Sorry. After my lovely vacation to California I just kind of went MIA in the blogging world. 

Well guess what my friends?!

IM BACK!

I do solemnly swear to write again and keep all you folks up to date on our crazy life as it happens. 

But cut me some slack aye?

I have a 9 month old running me into the ground each day! 

Holy tallito. 

I.

Have. 

A.

NINE. 

MONTH.

OLD.

One that says " Ah uh ju" (i love you), "Ma-ma", "Da-da" and her newest is, "No".

She crawls into every nook and cranny imaginable and invisible, has a tooth, can almost free stand on her own and loves to make as much noise as she possibly can.

I just love her so darn much.

Stroller mania-register 8!

With our trips to Ca and Peru coming up, my husband and I have been busy getting ready. We showed our apartment some TLC that was much needed, finished finals up and went shopping for a few things.

While shopping I had the opportunity to 'talk down a price' of an item we really wanted. I'm not one to do this because I get embarrassed and though my mother would NOT agree with me, I don't like to argue. But it was 10pm, I was tired, I had an exhausted baby and husband and my brain was all outa wack.
WARNING: You may find me a tad over the top, maybe even crazy after reading this but I promise, I'm not! And that this was not a usual occurrence for me.

SO......here's what happened. 

I am completely proud of myself for this by the way!!

We went looking for a cheap stroller that I could take to the airport so in the case that something happened to it, it wasn't our nice and expensive one. Not to mention it'll be a lot easier lugging it around when it's just me and the baby. We found a few at good ol' Wally-World but they were all either boy or girl patterned/colored. That's all fine and dandy but we like buying neutral colored baby items in the case our 2nd child is not a girl.

No, no no, this is NOT an announcement.

So we find stroller #1. It's a neutral color, it's sturdy not too big, not too small and it even has a visor on it. No box, no label on it and the only price we could find said $48.00. Ouch. So I thought since it must have been a display that maybe we could get a small discount on it. 

We put it in the cart. 

After meandering through the store a while longer, like an hr, we came back and picked up stroller #2. Pink, polkadots, no visor, small, un stable wheels-$15. Ehh.

With both strollers in the cart we discussed and decided that we wouldn't pay more than $25 for stroller #1 so if we found that it was more we'd just get stroller #2.

We got to the register and asked the cashier to find the price for us. At first he looked really annoyed that we had asked him and said to us, "Did you not ask an associate back there?" WOW. I was just thinking, "Well, there's a thought. Now you'd think if I had seen someone I would have asked but noo we are in Walmart and there is absolutely no ever ever, that works here, to ask for help. Ever." I didn't say this to him and tried to be nice but I was thoroughly annoyed and just needed to go to bed. He told us that they sell displays for a bit cheaper so he proceeded to 

scan this dog gone stroller over and over and it just came up as item not found. Emmett kept saying, "We can just get the other, we can just get the other." I was determined to get this stroller though. Looking back now I REALLY don't really know why or what came over me.

He called his manager over and she tried scanning it but no such luck. She even said they DONT sell displays but still tried scanning it. Again Emmett was just saying we could buy the other one but this time he looked very embarrassed. The cashier saw the look on my face and looked back and Emmett and said, "She doesn't want it, man." He was right haha! I was even telling people in line behind us that they would probably want to go to the next cashier because we might be awhile. WHO AM I!?

Eventually we DID buy stroller #2.  The manager said she was going to take the first stroller to customer service and figure out what was going on with it. ALL I WANTED WAS TO KNOW THE PRICE! Well, I had one last chance so I chased her down after being rung up saying, "Um, excuse me, Miss, excuse me!" I asked her if she could write down my name and number and if she did in fact figure out the price of the stroller and it was $25 or less could she call me and I'd come get it.

She pulled HER manager over and we told him the story. He says, "Oh, well, just sell it to her for $10."

WHAT!? SCOREEEEE!!!!

I was so pleased with myself. We returned stroller #2 and walked out with #1, saving $40.

It sounds like we were there doing this for an hr but really it all happened in a span of about 10 minutes.  Emmett still looked embarrassed but he was very happy and proud too :)

Two Lips Tulips

After hours, and I mean HOURS of begging and pleading, I finally convinced Emmett to take Haddie and I to the tulip festival at Thanksgiving Point today. I have been wanting to go every year since I've moved to Utah and it finally happened! We have The Flower Fields in Carlsbad, Ca but I've never actually gone to that, though I always would have liked to. Maybe One day.

After knowing what the flower fields back home were like (You can see them from the road) I pictured this tulip festival to be the same. Unfortunately, it was not anything like the one back home. But none the less, it was beautiful.

It wasn't really a FIELD of flowers, more like a nature walk. It was probably a good mile or two long though so we got in our exercise. Emmett had to carry Hads too because we forgot our stroller as we rushed out the door. The sun was shining but it was oh so cold. 

Wind chill like no-badyyys bidnuussss.

Personally, I thoroughly enjoyed the gift shops.

They were like a live Pinterest walk through. SO many cute crafting ideas just making their homes in my brain almost like a likable, welcome, parasite. 

Ok, getting weird? Sorrynotsorry.

After the tulip extravaganza we went home and quickly changed into formal attire, or try a STEP above church attire and went to Emmett's senior banquet dinner. 

I CAN'T BELIEVE MY HUSBY IS GRADUATING COLLEGE!!!

PROUDGUSHINGWIFEY.

We had free Tacanos and for those who live around here know how AMAZINGLY AWESOME that is. I was able to see some of the other wives of Emmett's friends that I haven't seen in a while so that was lovely. One couple just had their 3rd baby and he is just precious. 

Makes me want to give Haddie a baby brother or sister.

Yes, I did just say that.

No, this is NOT an announcement. 

Here's pictures :)

Haddie's new 'smile' she's been trying this past week.

Yes, that is little miss thang sitting up all on her own in the middle of that, eh, garden thing.

A REAL LIFE SECRET GARDEN!

Story of my life

Okay I'm not really going to go into the story of my life. I'm just going to tell you a funny story that happened to me last night which basically sums up how my life normally goes.

Ahem.. ok. 

So last night I convinced Emmett to take us all to the Senior Celebration on campus for all the graduating seniors and their families. He didn't really want to go but hey, you're only a senior once!

When we got there they had many activities. One being ping pong. We scored a table and starting playing with some friends. Emmett and I went head to head and truth be told-he whomped me. 

LITERALLY.

 There we are just playing around, goofing off and not playing seriously when he smacks that little plastic ball so hard and fast at me I didn't even see it coming!! 

Hit me right in my chest and let me just tell ya, this morning I STILL have a mark from it.

Obviously that's not the funny part.

Here's the funny, kinda sad, part:

I decided I HAD to try and get him back. Only fair right?

So it's my turn to serve and I'm thinking, 

"HA! He has no idea what's about to hit him, I'm going to smack this little ball so hard in his direction...that'll teach him. Muahahahaha! This is for all the wives that have ever been hit by a ping pong ball hit by their husbands!" 

*SMACK!*

Now OF COURSEEEE my ball would fly right past him (it was very hard and fast though, mind you).    All of a sudden it's like slow motion as I'm watching this ball fly through the air and my smile slowly turns to a "Nooooo" type face when I see this innocent, happy, crawling BABY behind him and the ball I just smacked heading right for him. 

These were my faces. 

Well...as you can probably imagine it hits that poor kid right in the forehead and he puts his head down just in time for that plastic, white, evil ball to dribble up and down from floor to head, floor to head. I nearly wet my pantalones. 

OF COURSE THERE WERE SPECTATORS...OF FREAKING COURSE!

Two by standers near the kid looked at me like I had just killed a baby bird or something. 

May as well have..

I rushed over there apologizing that I had just used their poor child as a target and what was supposed to be revenge on my husband. They slowly backed away saying, "It's not our kid.."

 Phew, I had gotten away with it. 

Oh and PS, the kid was completely fine :)

 Then the mother, the real mother, looks at me and starts shaking her finger in my direction. *GULP*

She then smiled and all was forgiven. Though I'm sure if her baby had been screaming it may have been a different ending to this story. 

I felt so bad. 

Moral to the story?

Sometimes, revenge is just not worth it.

BECAUSE I SAID I WOULD

I stumbled across this gem today and I can't help but pass it on and feel passionate about it. 

This man dropped EVERYTHING to fulfill a dream of fulfilling others' dreams all for the sake of his father that has passed and live the way his father lived. Keeping promises. Helping others.

We've all heard of PAY IT FORWARD. 

You do something nice for someone with only one request...pay it forward by doing something nice for someone else. 

This is the same concept. 

BECAUSE I SAID I WOULD.

 Watch this video by clicking the link below, check out this website and read the stories of blessings come true and promises kept.

Whether it's a promise to yourself, a commitment to someone else....the world could become a much better place if we all lived like this.

BECAUSE I SAID I WOULD

Request your Free Because I Said I Would cards HERE

Don't forget to "like' his Facebook page:

https://www.facebook.com/BecauseISaidIWould

I'm ordering my cards today!

Sonder

I wanted to share this picture because I had no idea there was a word for this. 

I am always thinking about these things when driving, sitting at a park or even taking in a breathtaking view.

An April of Awesomeness

This month we have so many exciting adventures and things to look forward to!

 One, we can just start with, is that Little Miss Haddie turns SIX months old TODAY!

So happy half birthday to my little gem of a daughter.

It's mind boggling to think about how fast the time with her has flown and all she has accomplished in her short time here with us. It's gone fast, but so much has happend! 

Her most recent accomplishment has been exploring shelves/drawers.

The other day, and this has happend a couple times since, I left her for a minute to go get her some socks. When I came back into the room she was not where I left her but at our table pulling out magazines we have on the lower shelf. I turn her the other direction and proceed to clean up her mini mess when I hear jingles, crashes and giggles. I turn around and she had wormed her way over to her basket of toys and dumped them out all over the place.

Must be that time to start finding some higher homes for some of our things around the house.

For her half birthday I decided I would take her to her newest favorite place today to celebrate. The park! 

Kid loves her swings and sunshine. 

Girl after my own heart.

Also coming up this month we have:

Mommy, Daddy and Uncle Eric Fletcher coming into town-in 2 days!!

Had's six month check up

We can see how much she's grown since the last one!

Conference

What is conference?

Stake Conference

This same day we are having new friends come over for dinner!

MY BEST FRIEND DEBBIE COMES HOME FROM HER MISSION!

Emmett has his last day of the semester and that means only one more semester left!!

We have Emmett's Senior Banquet for his Chemical Engineering Dept.

Dinner and celebrations!

And then....

OUR TRIPS TO CALIFORNIA AND PERU!!!

OHMERGERSH!!! This is going to be one epic month :D

Easter Sunday

This last Sunday was very special. I love my calling as primary teacher! My group of kids are such huge examples to me and they teach me so much without even knowing it. They are so smart and add a lot to my lessons. During sharing and singing time they sing with their hearts and very loudly. Not to be obnoxious, they feel the spirit and just let it flow through them. I see them close their eyes and belt out the hymns. Warms my heart how much they love this gospel and Jesus Christ.
My lesson this week was on the first missionaries. A subject very near and dear to my heart, being a convert. The kids can be hard to get focused and stay that way so somedays I feel like they just don't hear anything I'm saying. Well, to my surprise they do in fact listen, even when they don't show that they do. I shared with them a personal story from after I was baptized...

I had just gotten my wisdom tooth pulled so I looked like a squirrel with bloody gauze coming from my mouth. I could barely speak let alone move my jaw. I was going into a store to get my prescription filled when I saw a man outside the doors. I remember him looking lonely, dirty and tired but still had a smile on his face and was trying to talk to people. I don't think he was asking for money but he was trying to share some sort of information with them. I was in a rush to just get in and out without having to talk to anyone and hopefully not see anyone I knew so I didn't take the time to see what this man was  doing. While standing in line I was thinking I should share my testimony with this man. Then I thought there was no way because I looked a fright and my mouth had just taken an enormous beating. As I was leaving the store I walked by him again and my heart started pounding. It was so hard I felt it in my ears. I remembered that I had some Books Of Mormon in the trunk of my car so I pulled one out and wrote my testimony in it. I walked it back to the man and he was genuinely happy and so sweet as I approached him. (Probably just happy someone was giving him their time).  Not having any game plan on what I was about to do or say, I gave him the book and tried as hard as I could to clearly tell him I knew this book could change his life as it did mine. He looked at me with teary eyes and started asking me questions about it. He sounded so sincere in his questions, like he really wanted to understand. For the few minutes I spent with him, answering his questions, sharing my testimony, flipping through the book with him I had forgotten about my swollen cheeks and major headache. I was just happy to be there with him in that moment. He told me how grateful he was and said he couldn't wait to get home and read it. As I drove away he waved and smiled at me and I saw him flipping through the pages with a giant smile on his face.
I wish I could say I know what happened to that man after I left him that day but I don't. I can only hope he read it, believed it, and let it change his life for the better. Maybe the missionaries found him. Maybe I was that first stepping stone for him to a new direction. All I know is that he was grateful I gave him the time, that he knew I cared about him and that I left him smiling and thirsty to know more.

During sharing time one of the leaders gave the whole class the opportunity to go up one by one and tell us one reason they know that Heavenly Father loves them. Their answers were not ones I would have expected from children their age. "I know Heavenly Father loves me because He sent His son to die for me. " "I know Heavenly Father loves me because He put me in great hands when I broke my arm and made the pain bearable." "I know Heavenly Father loves me because He has given us a way to go back and live with Him again." One of my kids turned to me and said, "You should share that story you told us in class and how Heavenly Father loves that man." Heart officially melted right then and there. They do listen!


I know that if we aren't quick to judge others, without knowing their circumstances and give them the time, treat them like the child of God they are and love them, it can change their life. Who knows for how long but you may never know if you don't try. You could be their new beginning or even the final 'sign' they were waiting for. We don't have to be on an official mission or in a distant land to serve our Heavenly Father and help Him to spread the gospel. Testimonies don't have to be complicated to be touching. I know that if we follow the teachings we are given, let our light shine and live the way we are asked while sharing our testimonies, that that is the best way to serve our Heavenly Father. You are being an example and people WILL notice. Even those you wouldn't expect. People watch and listen and they will be curious. Missionary work is a domino effect. You share with one, then they share with another and it just continues from there. Like Samuel Smith. He was rejected when trying to share the Book Of Mormon with a man but he followed the spirit and gave the book to the man's wife. That family was later converted and shared the gospel with more family and they were converted and so on and so forth. It happens and you could be the one to tip the scale. It could not only change someone else's life, but your own. I'll never forget how I felt that day sharing what I know to be true with him. I felt a sense of accomplishment, a happiness and fulfillment  in my heart. I know I left that man in good hands and that our Heavenly Father is taking good care of him.

On a side note: Here is what my family was up to this Easter! We took Haddie to the park and she tried the swings for the first time and she loved them!  Easter came and went super fast this year. I still can't believe we are already in April! This time last year I was already 2 months pregnant and now in just a day my little babe will be 6 months old!!

In my family, we would always wake up to Easter baskets at the foot of our beds, hunt for eggs, re-hide them and hunt again, and have a big, delicious dinner. Last year I tried to re-live my childhood and I made a basket for Emmett. I had hide it from him in our tiny apt the day before and then put it out after I knew he was fast asleep. I was surprised to learn he never got baskets growing up! 

Well now we have our own little girl we get to start fun traditions with. Unfortunately we did not make her a basket this year but my mom sent her one with some cute outfits, a couple little toys and lots of candy for Emmett and I :) I'm way excited about playing Santa, the Easter Bunny etc and start some traditions Haddie will look back on  and maybe even continue when it's her turn to be a mommy. (YEARS from now of course!!)

A tree climber like her mamma!

Uncle Aaron may not have liked Auntie Andrea's no bake cookies but Hads sure did.

My 3rd re-birth birthday

Three years. THREE YEARS!! On this day three years ago I knew my life would be so different and so great, and I was right. I was baptized a member of The Church Of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints! I was just turned 21 years old, the age everyone can't wait for, never in a million years would I have thought that would happen, but it did! It did because I was in search of something greater, something true, that I could rely on and something I could look to to better myself, all without even really knowing it until I found it. 

I was so unhappy with the person I was becoming and tired of 'sitting still' in life. I was making drastic, life altering decisions more on impulse than really thinking them through only hoping that they would make me happy and fulfilled. I was making choices that weren't exactly helping get where I wanted to be, though, back then I wasn't really sure where that was. 

I was involved with a wonderful family and someone close to me that was searching for the same things I was. It was no accident how I came to the church. They helped guide me and light the way. This friend was praying and praying for answers on where to go, what was right, what was true, when the good ol' missionaries showed up. (I believe saying that they were told they should come visit this friend by a home teacher). Well they started talking more and I didn't even know about it for a little while. Then one day when I was over at this family's home, my fate knocked on their door, wanting dinner. Ok actually I'm not sure they came for dinner but it was my fate. They were supposed to come that night, though I didn't know this, and my friend had called and canceled their meeting. One of the missionaries, being new, somehow missed the voicemail left on their phone and they showed up anyways. BAM. First lesson! 

Now I'm not going to lie, you are probably thinking it was that first lesson that leaves the investigator wanting more but for me, I wanted to run and run fast. It was totally not what I was expecting, completely caught me off guard and I left that night feeling like I sounded so stupid, not knowing anything they were asking me and wasn't understanding anything they were talking to me about. It wasn't the missionarie's faults though! They were so kind and polite and you could tell they were just as nervous as I was, being new and all. But after that night I decided it wasn't for me but I'd support my friend in it if it meant so much to him. Originally we had decided that we would try his church and then try my church and see what fit us better. Needless to say we never did actually go to my church haha.

Anyways....

Another night comes, I don't remember, maybe a week or so later?...and they showed up and surprised me again at this family's home. I think I was probably sweating up a storm, shaking, couldn't pronounce my words correctly and just wanted to, again, run. Run really fast. BUT for some reason or another, I didn't. I didn't use one of the MANY excuses as to why I should leave that I concocted in my mind as I was sitting there in the living room with them. They broke down the basics, started with what I DID already know and THAT was the lesson that left me wanting more. I started meeting with them a couple-few times a week. I was always left so thirsty for more. I probably called them so many times that they knew it was me every time their phone would ring. 

I was starting to feel like I had a purpose in life. I was smiling from ear to ear all the time and it wasn't forced. It was almost like I had this crazy force inside that was so strong and I was about to burst at the seams with happiness. I never remember feeling this way before. 

*Not even when the ice cream man broke down on my street when I was a kid and they were giving away all their ice cream because it was going to all melt!*

Yeah.

When I started thinking about being baptized I decided to bring it up to my family. We were all at a restaurant and it was the perfect time, when we were all together. I remember bringing it up and then being drilled. Question after question about what I was getting myself into and did I actually really know what I was talking about. Well, surprise, surprise, I had an answer for everything. Some I actually looked back on later and thought, "Wait, how did I know that?" It was kind of unreal. 

Long story short, I was baptized. I think I actually asked if I could be baptized before I was asked to be  baptized. 

I was given a journal by another member for my big day with a super sweet card encouraging me to write about my feelings and progression. So thankful I have that to look back on. I don't read it as often as I should but looking back on it today brings back all my happy feelings and gets my spiritual juices flowing, making me want to do it all over again! 

I thought I'd share some little tid bits from my very first journal about my big day and some of my progression in my first yr. I mean, who explains it better than someone who JUST went through it  all am I right?!

I feel on so many occasions in my life leading up to my 21st year of life, I was being prepared for this day. I remember my very best friend/sister from kindergarten and her mom having the missionaries over when we were still very young. I only remember playing games with them, starting to pray over meals and, ahem, pushing them in the pool...gulp. I don't think I ever really understood who they were and what they were doing there.
Another incident was when I went to see Disney on ice in San Diego. Everyone knows the SD temple looks like a princess castle. Well, it's right on the edge of the freeway and we were driving home late and I saw it all lite up for the first time. I told my mom it was Snow White's castle and that I was going to go there someday. HA. She probably just went along with my childish dream not knowing that one day, I really would be going there. Anyways..

-BAPTISM DAY-

Eeeep!!

"Leading up to this day I was so eager, so thirsty to learn all I could soak up. I wanted to meet with the missionaries everyday if I actually could have. I went to church regularly, read the scriptures I was given and more. I asked lots of questions and didn't keep it a secret of how excited I truly was. I knew everyone could tell and that made them excited for me which in turn made me that much more enthusiastic about it.......................I think for a moment I entered my own little world. Sitting there pondering about what was about to take place, the giant leap I was about to take, the realization that I was about to really be forgiven of everything I had ever done up until that moment, without a single doubt in my mind. .......I felt the spirit all around, helping me, watching me go to the steps. Brother Snapp reaching out to me, ready to go. We locked arms and I closed my eyes listening to what he was saying. I was lowered into the water and my mind was quiet, I felt it was just me in the room for a moment and I felt my past wash away. It never happened to who it matters most..."

For the record, I was the very last person to leave the building that night. After I said good bye to everyone I sat in my car and cried. Happy tears of course, and I listened to the only church music I had, Jeremy Camp. I did this for about 20 minutes or so <3 "It was the first time I was completely alone but didn't feel lonely."

-DAY AFTER-

"The day after my baptism. I feel so amazing. I'm on top of the world today. I feel as if all the things that would normally bring me down have 0 effect over me. At Starbucks I was working the drive-thru and a co-worker, _____, came by. She told me once before my baptism that she didn't understand why I wanted to do it. I tried explaining but got some doubtful looks. Today, however, she said to me, "Danica, you're glowing!" I told her with a huge smile, "I was baptized yesterday, I was told people would say that.""

-CONFIRMATION DAY-

I remember this day very well. When I was called to the front of the church to be confirmed a member and receive the Holy Ghost I practically skipped to the front I was so excited.  When the confirmation began it was the first time in the whole process I got nervous. I started to shake. I wasn't sure it was me or if I was imagining it but I was later told it was in fact me haha. I got this cold shiver that ran through my whole body but it went so fast and was replaced by an incredible warmth. Like laying in the sun on the hottest day of the yr but feeling it from the inside. A feeling I will NEVER forget. After the blessing I tried to stand but literally couldn't feel the floor. I remember thinking to myself, "take a step, now another, turn around...", like I was learning how to walk all over again. Each step was as if nothing was under me. I got to my seat but was asked to stand again. I said, accidentally out loud, "If I can even hold myself up long enough to stand." I got some laughs from that one. 

""I'll remember these days forever", I thought to myself and bowed my head to pray. I gave my gratitude to the Lord, my Savior, my missionaries, my family, the people in the ward and everyone who helped me get here today. I'am apart of this church now and forever and I feel the love <3"

Three years later and I still can't believe how far I've gotten and I know I owe it all to my Heavenly Father and my Savior, Jesus Christ, the missionaries and the supportive families. I have been married and sealed in the temple to my very best friend for time and ALL eternity, gained the most incredible, loving family, I have been blessed beyond words with a healthy, beautiful daughter, my mother and my aunt have felt and accepted the unconditional love our Heavenly Father has for  each of us and were baptized and cleansed just over a year ago and my life has been changed for the better in so many ways, by so many people. I know that this was the right decision for me to make, along with all the decisions I had to make along the way to get to where I am today. I'm grateful for the love and support people have shown me and for the sacrifice Jesus Christ made for all of us so that we could know the truth, feel the love of our Lord, and return to live with Him again. I'm grateful for the examples shown to me by Him and by fellow members, friends and family members. I know that there is no better way to live than a clean, pure, righteous way and if we follow the teachings of our prophet, Thomas S. Monson, the commandments and we take care of ourselves and those around us, we will be blessed. And we have so many blessings awaiting us. Those who are seeking something better, or maybe  are lost, or even those who have already found Christ, I urge you to read the Book Of Mormon and pray to know what is true. I promise you will receive your answer and answers to any other questions or struggles you may have if you ask with a real intent, but I know it will happen in the Lord's time and at the best time for you in your life, just as it did for me.

There is no greater love!!!

Doctrine and Covenants 78:17-19

"Verily, verily, I say unto you, ye are little children, and ye have not as yet understood how great blessings the Father hath in his own hands and prepared for you; 

And ye cannot bear all things now; nevertheless, be of good cheer, for I will lead you along. The kingdom is yours and the blessings thereof are yours, and the riches of eternity our yours.

And he who receiveth all things with thankfulness shall be made glorious; and the things of this earth shall be added unto him, even an hundred fold, yea, more."